Твоя жена говорит, что я лучше тебя

You've been sending me many emails telling me how much prettier than your wife you think I am. This isn't a fetish of mine, as I've tried to tell you, because bringing women down is not my thing. But, you wouldn't take 'no' for an answer - so, I decided to trace your email address and I found you on social media - and I found your wife. Your wife is fucking gorgeous! So, anyway, I got in touch with her to tell her you'd been begging me to trick you. Anyway, we decided to meet up, me and your wife - she's lovely - and she took me home... So we decided to do our own experiment, not to see if I was better than her, but to see if I was better than YOU. It turns out she thinks I am. I talk you through what we did and how I can last so so so much longer than you. This wasn't the experience you wanted, was it?